When I get angry at someone, I decide I won't communicate with that person anymore. After a while, my anger goes down, and I start thinking, what's the point? Everybody has problems. I can just ignore the issue and keep communicating. When I start communicating again, that person does the same thing to me again, and make me think I shouldn't have changed my mind and let them hurt me again.
When I was in school, we had a landline only. I used to keep a phone book and write all my classmates' phone numbers in it. If I decided not to call a person again for any reason, I used to cut the phone number out and mark it so dark that I couldn't figure it out again.
Because I knew I would change my mind after some time, I tried to recover the phone number and call that person again. I really tried, but because I had marked it as dark, I couldn't. I was thinking, why did I do that? I couldn't call that person anymore.
But I was right the first time. So I always try to follow my first decision. I know that if I change it, I might regret it more.
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