In
Bangladesh, there is some common activity, before getting married. One of them
is to get information about the future bride or groom. Generally, people go to
that girl’s/boy’s area and ask neighbours about them. Or to those people who may
know about the future bride or groom. Whatever those neighbour or people said,
people believe it. Sometimes they break the relation on basis of this information. There are no further queries or validation checks about that info.
The reality
is, you don’t know these informers. Are they reliable? Are they telling you the
truth? Whatever proof they are showing, are those good enough to decide? NO.
But who cares? You will find another girl or boy for your family.
What
happens, many times you get the wrong information. People basically don’t want
any good for others. They feel jealous of every single good step in another's life.
So, whenever they get a chance, they spread false information.
Some
are different. They don’t want to make any harm to others. So, even if they
knew something, they just hide it and say something good so that the new relation doesn’t
get hampered.
So,
either way, you will get the wrong information.
Some
people want to make themselves important. So, they create some new information
and present it as a very important truth.
How
can you rely on these people’s information? You can ask. But try to verify that
information. Before making a final decision ask the girl/boy directly. Let
them have a chance to clear themselves out.
I
can give you an example. Someone asked our neighbour about our older sister.
That neighbour also has a daughter who was studying with my sister. So, the person
thought, the neighbour might give her good information about my sister. The
neighbour said, my sister, got second division in SSC. Then the person said, but I
heard she has got star marks! The neighbour became angry and replied, “What
happens if she has stars, she had passed in second division!” We would never know
about our neighbour’s mentality if that person didn’t ask us about it.
The reality
is my sister has got star marks in SSC. And got placed 13th in HSC.
None of our family ever got Second Class in SSC.
