Biography 20: My younger sister born

 One day I noticed my older sister and other relatives were very excited about something. I didn't bother, even if I would bother, they won't tell me anyway. But this time, my sister came to me with some pictures. She told me this is your younger sister. I could see my mother is sitting on a chair (Very simple made of Iron. In those days people didn't use plastic chairs everywhere, they had these iron chairs for general use), wearing a red sharee (I like that sharee very much) and she was holding a baby looks like a potato. In another picture, the baby was in her bed, inside a mosquito net. Later my mom told us, the net was for flies. There were lots of flies over there. My mom also told us, in the desert area the weather is very dry. The baby's skin couldn't resist it, it was cracked and blood used to come out. So, my mom always kept her wet in Olive Oil. Among all siblings, this sister has a brighter skin colour. So, I always thought it was because of the olive oil. I wish my mom did that with me too :(

After having two girls, my dad really wanted a son this time. I heard from others that he told people, if he got a son this time, he will sacrifice a cow. Maybe Allah wanted to save a cow. So, not only this time but his next child (Child number 4) was also a daughter. Later, my 3rd sister became a doctor and 4th one became a dentist. Obviously, Allah wanted to give him more than what he wanted...

MONEY CAN'T BRING HAPPINESS FOR YOUR DAUGHTER

My maid is much tensed. She recently gave her elder daughter marry. First she was in economic problem, because, she had to give money, to her son-in-law, for business. Then in Eid she had to give dresses and shoe to the new son in law including her daughters.

Now she is in other problem. She has to give full furniture to her daughter as she is going to start her new life. And she can't buy old furniture to save money... all has to be new. She is saying she doesn't know what to do...

Here I must say... this became very common scenario in Bangladesh (may be in some other country too). People who has money gives all possible things to their daughters after marry. This makes greedy to the groom family more and makes jealous of other people in neighbor. All likes to bring bride from these kind of (money making) family, don't care who is going to be their bride (in some cases they look for beautiful and educated girls too including wealthy family).

Because of this situation middle class family faces problems. No matter what they give, grooms family never satisfied. Always expected more (some says directly, some indirectly).

For this tradition poor family suffers more. Their family can never fulfill grooms family demand and the daughters had to pay for it by all kind of (physical, mental, social etc) torture. Many families killed their bride to get more money.

My suggestions to the wealthy family... please drop this tradition. Let the groom hold your daughter by his own responsibility. The universal truth is "MONEY CAN'T BRING HAPPINESS FOR YOUR DAUGHTER". No matter how much you give... if the groom family has mental problem (mostly has) they will give pain to your daughter. Some might directly say, "We didn't bring you to see your face, you have to work for this family", some may use different indirect word.

If a good family want a bride and ready to keep her happy, they won't demand or expect anything but your daughter. If your daughters go there in one set of cloth they will be happy to have her....

Please stop this bad habit (giving furniture) for your daughter.

Unless we can stop this tradition, we can’t expect people will like to have girl child and raise them… obviously they will to kill them in mother’s womb.