Biography 146: Marriage in grade 12

 I have passed grade 12 from Viqarunnisa noon college, Bangladesh. It's called the HSC (Higher Secondary Certificate) exam in Bangladesh.

In Bangladesh, Viqarunnisa College is one of the most renowned colleges for girls. Many wealthy families students come here to study and most of the talented girls come from all over Bangladesh. I am from a middle-class family. I did not get a chance to mix with any wealthy families. If any of our known families became rich, they stopped mixing with us. So, I do not have any idea about their lifestyle.

In college, I had the most lonely time of my entire life. People didn't like me, and neither did I like them. They use to humiliate me, I didn't bother, what they say or do.

But I was really surprised to see them get married before the final exam. It's not one or two people, most of them. Mainly to the military guys. Then to doctors and engineers. I was thinking, didn't any of them ever think to make any career or work on their father's business?

I have seen when they come to give the exam, the girl I have seen most dangerous, always jumping and laughing became very polite. Smiling with a shy attitude. I am amazed. Maybe it was good for them. I wish them to get married earlier to make my life easier.

I have discussed this with the older sister, what's the matter, they are not from low-income families, why do their parents need to get them married so early?

My sister replied they are too fast forward to control. The way they behave with parents and boyfriends, their parents know, they can't control these girls much. Before they do any big mistakes, they better get married.

I recalled my memories, yes, in college I heard many times that girls don't attend the classes. Run away from classes to meet with boyfriends and enjoy time with them. It is too early for a girl to understand that they be used by their male partner. So, obviously, parents and teachers were worried about them.

Biography 17: Dance

 I think, after learning how to jump, I didn't waste any single day without jumping or running till teenage. One day my parent took me to watch a movie in the cinema hall. We were waiting outside for tickets. In the meantime, someone played a popular movie song. I recognized that and screamed, it's my dad's song then started dancing. My mom said she felt very embarrassed at that moment. I still don't know why? Why in our country (Bangladesh) people don't like to see a girl dancing, jumping around as she wanted.

Because of too much movement, my uncle (My mom's older brother) asked my mom to teach me to dance. My mom first admitted me to Bangladesh Shishu Academy in the dancing class. I had learned dancing over there for 4 years. Every month they had some program, and because of that, I became used to dancing on the stage. Sometimes our teacher took us out for an outdoor performance.

Then mom realized to become good at dancing, I should learn classical dance too. She took me to Bulbul Lalito Kola Academy. Here I had learned dancing for 4 years too. I attended both places at the same time.

At Bulbul Academy one day we have got a substitute teacher, Mr. Shingho Roy. His family was traditionally involved with classical dance. My mom wanted me to learn better so she asked him to join as a private tutor for my dance. He agreed, for a couple of months, he teaches me Manipuri dance, Kathak, Gypsy dance. Later he became a dance instructor in the movie so couldn't give me time.

I didn't realize it in my childhood but now I understand, why my mom put so much effort into my dancing. She knew I'm not going to take it as a profession. But I was doing really well. On those days I have competed in many kids competitions at the dancing section. And each and every time I have got prizes.

During those days I have joined a TV program too. It was a Bangla New Year celebration program. The of the program was "Chhoy ritur ei desh"/ The country of six seasons. I was at the Spring dance and side performer in the winter part. This was my very first earning. I had taka 65 for this performance.

In those days, I use to choreograph my own performances. Especially for the competition and stage show.

I was very young, but during this period of time, I realize, how people make good relations with teachers and get benefited, people use the money to get a better chance etc. And I knew, I'm never going to do this kind of act.

I have stopped learning and dancing on the stage when I was in grade 5. I knew I wasn't the best at dancing, but I knew this too that I was very good at dancing. Wherever I danced, people liked it so much.

I had a dream, someday I will dance with my man, romantic dance types or just holding together in the music. Someday I want to dance with my son too. I want it a little bit funny way. Till now he said, he has no interest in dancing. Let's see.

জি এফ (GF)

[English version has given below]

এখন যদি আপনি বিরক্ত হয়ে বলেন যে, সব আমার দৃষ্টিভংগীর কারনে দেখাচ্ছে, তথাস্তু। হতেই পারে। কিন্তু আমার যা মনে হয়েছে, তাই তো বলব?

You may feel irritated and say, "It's your way of looking..." Yes. Can be. But whatever I felt, I should say so, right?

বন্ধু বন্ধুকে জিগ্যেস করে, কিরে তোর জি এফ এর খবর কি? বন্ধু হয়তো একটু লজ্জা গলায় বলে, ভালই।

When one friend asks another friend, "How is your GF?" His friend blushes and reply, "Yeah good".

এখন যদি আমি কোন লিফটের সামনে দাড়িয়ে জি এফ লেখা দেখে প্রথমেই পড়ি "গার্ল ফ্রেইন্ড", তাতে আমার কি দোষ? তারপর মনে হয়, ওহ না, এটা হলো "গ্রাউন্ড ফ্লোর"!

Now when I go inside a elevator and see GF, in my mind I say "Girl Friend", then is it my problem? Then again thought, "Oh no, it means Ground Floor!"

বহুতল ভবনের উপর থেকে নীচে নামতে হলে আপনাকে এই জি এফ এর কাছেই যেতে হবে :)

When you have to came down from multistory building, you have to go to this GF :)

[২৬ শে আগস্ট, ২০০৬ ]

What is the position of your wife in your family?

I have seen, when a baby girl came on this earth how much happy her father became. They don’t understand what to do, to make this baby girl happy. It’s like an angel. From his heart he raises this baby day after day. What happen when some other family hurt this girl after marriage?

When you hurt your wife (mentally, physically or economically) do you ever think she is also a princess of some other person? You want to give the best for your baby girl. But your wife’s turn come after all expenses. After marriage a princess became a home slave with a day. Nobody will care for her any more; she is the unpaid slave to take care of all. Well people feed her; she has to be alive to work. She will get food after all other family member’s meal. Because it’s her duty to clean and complete other job after taking the meal. Moreover she will be reminded many times that she is taking food which is earned by some other person.

Girls are crazy for my son

My handsome son

Few days back I went to an office for some work, my son Shafeen (3 and half years old) was with me. I had to stand on a queue. After me a woman came with her daughter. In height she was little smaller than my son, her head was clean shaved (very usual scenario in Bangladesh), in one hand she was holding a chips packet and in other hand she was eating the chips.

I couldn’t keep my son stand in a place for a minute, he was running to other place and come back to me, jumping to see how the men are working in the table, wanted to work like them, trying to work on behalf of me etc. But he didn’t disturb anyone. I didn’t remove my eye from him. Well another person didn’t remove eye from him too, that little girl. When Shafeen stand beside and keep talking and jumping, that girl suddenly softly touched my son and keep stand with her mom. My son didn’t noticed, I told Shafeen that the baby wants to talk with you. Shafeen looked at her for some second, and then replied she is not talking. I said, she is too small to talk. Then shafeen again went back in his playing. The girl then took a piece of chips and hold in front of my son. I asked Shafeen the baby is now offering you chips. Shafeen looked at her; he was trained not to eat anything from a stranger, so he didn’t touch the chips. I told him, tell the baby, that your stomach is full so you won’t eat anything now. But my son isn’t strong enough to deny a lady in front of her. So, he kept quite. But the girl listened to me, so she took her hand back and put the chips into her mouth and again keep eating.

Hey, I was just making fun, I know, children always wants to play with another children.