First Pohela boishakh of my son

Shafeen at his first Pohela Boishakh (Bangla New Year)

He was just 4 months and 6 days old. He got this special dress (white, red) for pohela boishakh from his uncle (paternal).

Journey by train

Shafeen (my son) sleeping at upper bath and Dia (my youngest sisters daughter) sleeping at lower bath. Both liked the cabin very much 

Shafeen, me and Dia

Shafeen and me waiting in the Kamalapur Railway Station

Last year we had a train journey. It was awesome except some poor experience, which I like to share with you all, so that, before making any plan to journey by train, you can aware of those problems and benefits.

We traveled from Dhaka to Chittagong. Our train was at 7:30 am. We reached at the train station at 7:00am. A mother who has a toddler she knows very well how difficult it is to get up and get ready in the morning. After reaching we saw our train still not arrived and after 15 minutes we get to know that the train will be late. So, it may start at 11am. We have seen many passengers left the station, probably will come later. But for me it was difficult to carry all bags to home and bring back again. So, we waited at the first class waiting room. It was really good and we really could take rest over there. At the first floor of the station, there is a restaurant. My sister went there and had a good breakfast. She recommends it.

At 11am we get on the train. We booked an AC cabin. Accommodation was great; it was really clean and nice. The AC worked great. We really spend very good time in it in the total journey. We drink tea and eat food from train’s food court several times. At the beginning the journey started very well. Here I must say who doesn’t have any hurry on timing and want to have a good journey then must book a cabin and had a good train journey.

We are very familiar with traffic jam in city, but for the first time we faced train jam. Before every station (where the train shouldn’t stop) our train stopped for several minutes, because it couldn’t find the free train line to run. Many times I thought I should get down and buy some lunch packet, because in train only snacks are available.

And when the train stops, the door became open. Many people get on the train. They started fill all blank sits (without ticket). Even after some moment we had to stop going to the cafeteria because all chairs were filled up with traveling people. With every compartment of AC cabin or chair, there is a sit for a security person (I guessed) that is also became filled. If you traveled train before, you must notice there are some free spaces between every compartment of the train, that place also covered with people.

Finally by stopping hundreds of time we reached at Chittagong at 9pm. By this time all free spaces of train were filled up with people. Our children were very much tired by staying too long time in one small space.

A unique style time of a baby

When your baby grows up every month you will notice every new style. Here Shafeen use to keep his legs up. He was 4 months and 2 days old.

You don’t need to feel so important always

Sometimes for some incidence you felt very much important, sometimes actually you were wrong. Let me give you some example.

While my training was going on, one day our trainer gave us a URL and told us to browse. I didn’t know where I did the mistake in the URL, the site wasn’t coming in my pc. On that moment the class room was full of students, randomly I choose one who was sitting just behind me and request him to come to my pc and check the URL. For me that was the total situation. But for the boy the situation was just started… he started thinking why did I pick him, why not others, his friends started making joking with two of us, and as usual the boy started thinking of me. First, I didn’t notice that something is going on with this boys mind. From next he started to communicate with me every now and then. I get scared. I wanted to stop it, so I started avoiding him totally. But it took years to make him understand that there was nothing between us.

In universities, lots of young boys and girls do study. If a girl just smile to a boy, just for social manners, that she knows the boy or he is a student of her class, or department, he started feeling that he is the one. Otherwise why she gave me a smile, there are other boys were also available.

Sometimes we found some one’s face is matching with any of our relative or well known person, on that case you will try to notice the boy’s face twice to be confirmed… and what the boy is thinking on that moment, that he became a hero of that girl.

We girls when communicate with boys, we try to pick the safer one, like a married person or a person of other religion, so that love kind of thinking won’t come fast. But we are wrong, they also things the same way.

To friends I must say, please don’t force to think the boy that the girls started liking him. For you its fun, because you also know, it’s not the truth. But for the boy, it could be the life and death issue.

After Shafeen’s first hair cut

Shafeen got his first hair cut at his 3 months old age. His dad cut his hair; he almost took a full day to cut his hair.

Too much love isn’t good

If you love anybody too much, you don’t need to show them. Because it might make them tired (if they don’t love you that much), and they will try to run away from you.

When I was a kid, I loved all of my relatives and wanted love from them, too. If I got on anyone's lap, I wouldn’t get down soon (I can’t remember, but I have heard this story many times). If any child came to our house to play, I tried to keep them in our home in many ways. I talked to them nicely and gave them my toys, but nobody could stay. That’s the reality I learned after a long time. If I desperate to hear my boy friend‘s voice, and call them frequently, they will feel disturbed (before married, I had disturbed my husband a lot). If I call my husband too much, he won’t need to call me back. But I like to have his calls, too.

They won't like it if you want to say too many things to your boyfriend. So, no matter how much you love (may be like ocean) don’t need to express too much. Trust me, it’s good for you.

My son is doing the same as me. He loves children and plays with them. He loves those who show love to him too much. If they come or he goes to their house, he doesn't want to let them go back or doesn’t want to come back home. Even from the market, if I start for home, he asked me to go to another market. This way, actually, he is scaring others to come to him. If anybody came into our house, they knew my son would fall into tears if they said anything about going back.

 I am trying hard to teach my son to let them go, who wants to go.  I told him that if he let them go, they would return if they liked him. Trust me, my son. He is starting to realize the matter. Today, when his uncle wanted to go, he started crying but controlled himself and said “Allah hafiz, aabar aashben” (May Allah protect you, and come back soon), as I told him to say.

Then we had some mother son talk, I told him, see it worked, your uncle again came back and play with you. He said, yes, Mom, you were right.

Shafeen’s ring

After birth, Shafeen got his first gold ring from his cousin brother Tameem. He also got another ring from his grandmother (paternal). When this picture was taken, he (Shafeen) was just three months and one day old.

I have nothing to say

When I felt that I have nothing to say then any of two things works on me. One, I might feeling empty in my mind that I can’t say anything. Or number two is, I want to say too many things which might not be digestible for others so I kept silent. In most cases, number two works. 

Shafeen with black dot

Shafeen took a black dot on his forehead, he was 3 months and 1 day old.

Shafeen took a black dot (tip) at the middle of his forehead as his father had in his childhood.

Assuming project timing

It’s really difficult to fix a project time. You have to think your work ability, risk management, QA and finally your experience will help you to assume a project completion time. I have seen when we ask to the developers how much time you will take to complete it, they reply 1 day, which is the best they can do…. So easily I understood that actually they are going to take 2 and a half time. But clients don’t want to listen that they are always in hurry. So we had to plan that this work will take 1 and half day.

Finally what happen, developer couldn’t finish it within a day, and they took another extra hour on that night and half of next day to complete the task. So, we don’t have time to check properly but had to submit it to the client. Client found some bugs, so return it and developer and QA took another day to make it perfect. And the project took totally 2 and half day but the client paid only for 1 and half day as they planned.

So, you have to keep in mind all of these factor before planning for project timing.

Khoka ghumalo, para juralo

Shafeen was 2 months and 23 days old.

When my son awakens, I couldn't do anything but looking after him. I had got some time to eat, bath or do other thing when he fall in sleep. On that moment the only poem comes in my mind is “khoka  ghumao, para juralo”, if I translate it, I can say “baby fall in sleep and area got relived”.

The problems in dieting, when you are over weighted

Shafeen selecting menu at Dhakaiya at Bashundhara shopping complex

If you became over weighted, then you will start dieting. I thing the best dieting is to stop taking high calories food, like rice, rooti, polao, bread etc. You will see within few days you have looses 1 to 3 kg. If you want to continue this dieting then you have to mind up that no matter how hard it is, I will follow it; because you will feel week, no strength to work, vomiting, headache or many other problems. But you have overcome all if you really want to keep fit.

We had to go to a doctor regularly

Faisal, Shafeen (in Faisal's lap) and Tameem

When Shafeen was infant we had to go to a doctor regularly for his vaccine and other problems. This picture was taken when Shafeen was 2 months and 2 days old. Tameem (my elder sister’s son) was also with us.

Acting from general people, general life

Only cinema or TV actors don’t do acting, but general people also do. Like, in front of your boss you show that you really honor him, respect him…but with other person you always say that your boss know nothing. In front of your wife, you show that you love her a lot… but in front of other beautiful women you say you don’t love your wife at all. In front of your son you show you care for your daughter in law and her kid a lot. But unless your son came from office, you show hate to them in every single way.

I think, general people know, how to perform, more that an actor, to achieve their goal.

Here both were sleeping

Faisal and Shafeen at February 02, 2009

Faisal and Shafeen are sleeping. Here Shafeen was 1 month and 29 days old. 

Why should I trust PTC site

Shafeen at his father's office, he was 3 years, 1 month and 28days old.

PTC site means those websites or company, who gives money only to view their given websites. I have started with 21 PTC sites. Then day by day I had to stop them or sometimes they stopped me when my money was going to mature. Now I am clicking only 5. Hopping they will give me money, if not then I have to stop them too. I found 2 websites who gave me money, then one disappear and another asking to invest money to their company. I don’t trust them anymore.

When you wanted something from others

What do you do, when you want something from others? Do you try to hit and grab it? Do you make the environment impossible for them, that they forced to give you the thing? If these don’t work then beg? Finally request?

I believe first you should discuss with them about the matter or situation. Then ask or request or beg to have the thing. If they deny, then come back and wait to change their mind. Or if you can’t wait then hit (if only you have right to have the thing) but you must know, hitting people isn’t a good solution. In the long run, it will bring bad effect in your life. You better wait.

Shafeen’s mini bed

Shafeen sleeping inside the bed

My mother gave a mini, hanging bed with wheels to Shafeen (my 3 and half years old son) after his born. On those days he use to sleep with me, so didn’t use the bed much. But now he grown up and can’t sleep in that small bed. But now he likes the bed very much. Several times he told me to give him the bed as I stored it in different place. I told him, I will clean up the bed first (someday) then will give to you.

New style of father and son sleeping

Don’t worries they don’t sleep like this frequently. This picture is taken yesterday.

Shafeen and dady

Faisal and Shafeen

Faisal keeping the sleeping baby

Shafeen still sleeps like this. I took this picture when he was just one month and 17 days old.

Eid is coming

Shefeen took cloths for his mom

All Muslims, especially children always wait for the Eid, the big occasion in their life. But mostly business men wait for this occasion, in Bangladesh. In other part of the world, for Eid all prices goes down, business men give their product in fewer prices. Not in Muslim world, in other occasion of other religious people, like Christmas, Chinese New Year etc, all gives discounts and free products. But Bangladeshi businessmen didn’t believe in fewer prices, they only know, how it increase on every matter. If new budget are coming, increase the price, if flood came, increase the price, especially if Eid comes then do all year profit in one month.