At home, speak in your native language only.

 I have seen a trend among Bangladeshi parents in Canada. They speak English at home to their children. The logic I heard from one parent was that this helps the child feel comfortable speaking outside, because in school they have to speak English.

This way, the new generation is not learning to speak Bangla. Even if they knew some Bangla from Bangladesh, they are now forgetting everything. If you notice, you will see that when Bangladeshi kids get together, they never speak in Bangla among themselves, only in English.

Your kid will learn English anyway. Even if you don't want to teach them. And if they learn from outside, they will speak with correct pronunciation, not with your native accent. It's actually the better way to teach them English.

My suggestion is that everyone should speak in their native language at home. No other language, ever. This way, kids will learn the language and will not forget their roots. Bangladeshi people died to keep this language alive. At least we should have some respect for that.

Some people write in Bangla on Facebook and think it's a very good way to show respect for their native language. I believe this will only give you comfort when communicating with people who speak the same language. That's it. Nothing wrong with it. But if you have friends and family from another country, they won't understand anything, neither will your kid or anyone else learn the language from your Facebook activity. People who speak other languages will feel left out of your posts.

Biography 259: "Tanga Buri"

By Picasso

 We four sisters have grown up together. Once we were all kids, then one after another, we became older, and life moved forward to older teens and adults. Our brother was born a little late. So, he kind of grew up alone.

When we sisters were kids, we used to try to play together. In the beginning, it was great. Then different opinions started coming and finally ended up with a fight. My mom had to come and end all of this.

We had a common dance that we used to do. It's a funny dance, and we used to dance and laugh. While dancing, we used to say a rhyme, "Tanga Buri, Tanga bur," and then take one foot up and down. When one foot is down, make another leg up. Looks like a bird dancing. We assume we are all very old (Buri) and dancing like that. We laughed loudly while dancing because it was too funny to see what others were doing while they were laughing by watching mine. Our parents also used to laugh by watching us.

Conflicts within ourselves

 Recently, I had an interpersonal conflict with my son. He thinks he (was 13 years old) has grown up enough to decide what to do or not. However, as a mother, I found him to behave very childishly. He wanted to play games on the computer all day long, and if I didn’t stop him, he wouldn’t even sleep for 24 hours and keep playing.

My son believes I don’t understand him. He may also think I lack the knowledge of modern technology to understand him. We may have a huge generation gap. He thinks he needs more freedom to do whatever he likes.

“Implicit Personal Theory” works here because my son and I are guessing about each other’s behaviour and having a conflict. Our role play is like friends. We are making assumptions about each other’s behaviour.

Biography 186: My first tour to Cox's Bazaar (childhood activities of my cousins)

Here Shafeen brought some snow inside the house.

 I have seen some childhood activities of my cousins in that house. They are living in South Africa now. Got married and settled down.

When I went to their house, both cousins were in elementary school. They were doing excellent results in school on those days. All credit goes to my aunt. I have seen how patiently she used to sit with them and help them to study.

Tonoy is the older son. He used to give me company all of the time. He said he can sing well. I showed him dance in a contract that he would sing a song for me. But after my dance, he decided not to sing.

His younger brother is Tonmoy. Most of the time, he runs away from me whenever I try to talk with him. But always followed me from a distance. Just keep smiling at me. My aunt's first duty is to check his pockets when he falls asleep. He kept his whole world in his pockets, like toys, marbles, fruits like oranges, wires, etc. My aunt showed me that he broke the cupboard net to take out malta (fruit). He used to play outside and come home with a whole body of dust. My aunt first took him to the shower and let him go to the bedroom.

When they feel bore

 Now a day, it is tough to make my son agree that he was wrong. He thinks he knows better than his mom. He knows how to argue and try to win.

But I know I have to keep trying.

I told him that he never got bored when you were a kid. No matter where I took you, you could spend your time in your own way, like looking for something interesting, finding something to play with, etc.

But now a day, your only time spending way is on screen. So, if I take you anywhere, you don't see anything; you just feel bored and wait when will you get the screen (Cell phone, Tab, or laptop) again.

He was taking breakfast, which was not a good time to talk with him. But he made me surprised and kind of node his head to agree. I told him to try to bring back that capability again. 

মায়েদের অসুস্থ হবার উপায়ও নেই (A mother can never be sick)

মায়েদের অসুস্থ হতে নেই. হবার উপায়ও নেই. জ্বরে কাতর হয়ে একদিন শুয়ে বিশ্রাম নিয়েছি. সকাল থেকে দুপুর পর্যন্ত শাফিন নানু বাড়িতেই ছিল, বড়আপা ওকে খাইয়ে দিয়েছিল. তারপরও ছেলের জ্বর চলে এসেছে. কালকে সারা গায়ে ব্যাথা নিয়েই ছেলেকে খাওয়ালাম, স্পঞ্জ করলাম... ছেলে এখন অনেকটা ভাল হয়ে গিয়েছে. বুঝলাম, শরীর যতি বিদ্রোহ করুক, আমার মুক্তি নেই. কাজ চালিয়ে যেতে হবে.

A mother can never be sick. Actually she doesn't have choice.
After getting fever I took one day bed rest. Shafeen (my son) stayed at his grandmother's (maternal) house from morning to noon. My elder sister fed him. But still my son got fever 101. So, with the pain, all over the body I stand up and start taking care of him (feed him, sponge his body etc), and he became well. So no matter how you became sick... you have to keep going (after becoming a mother)

মুরগী পোষা সহজ কথা নয়।

Shafeen was playing with a chicken (toy); he was 1 year and 5 months old.

সব বাচ্চাদেরই পশুপাখি পুশতে ইচ্ছা করে। একসময় আমারও করতো আর পুষতামও। সেকথা থাক। যা বলছিলাম, আমার ছেলেরও সখ হয়েছে। বলল, আম্মু আমি ঘরে একটা মুরগী রাখবো।
আমি যথারীতি বললাম, আচ্ছা।
ও বলল, মুরগীটা আমার হাতের উপর বসে হাত থেকে কুটকুট করে খাবার খাবে।
আমি বললাম, আচ্ছা।
শাফিন বলল, পাক্কা (পায়খানা) কোথায় করবে?
আমি বললাম, ও তো আর বাথরুমে গিয়ে করতে জানে না, ও ঘরেই করবে।
শাফিন এবার আমার মুখের দিকে তাকালো আর বড় বড় চোখ করে বলল, হাতের উপরেও।
আমি বললাম, হমম।
শাফিন এই বিষয়ে আর কথা বলার প্রয়োজন বোধ করলোনা।
আমি স্বস্তির নি:শ্বাস ফেললাম।