Happy Birthday

 I like to greet people on their birthdays. I used to call them, sometimes at 12 am, just to start their day with a smile. Then someone told me, "Don't do this, especially with boys. They will think you have a crush on them."

Well, I only did this with my friends, colleagues, and family, and later I heard some of them say I had something on my mind, which is why I called them. Some said, I have an interest in them.

I surprised. Maybe I am not born for this world. Anyway, I stopped myself. It's true, I feel great when anyone says Happy Birthday, give me gifts. But I better not do this with others, because, they took it wrong, sometimes.

So, yeah, I don't say, but I wish everyone a Happy Birthday.

Nowadays, I send birthday messages on their FB Messenger. Who likes, replies; who doesn't, doesn't answer. I understood, from next don't send them any more messages.

Watching, following

 As far as I have seen, most people are scared of management. If they knew management was nearby or watching them, they started working, showed more dedication, sometimes acted like they were working a lot or showing off, and gave unnecessary advice to others to show leadership power, etc. They don't like management to look after their work.

I never felt troubled if management checked my work. Actually, I felt good about it. Because I work diligently whether anyone is watching or not. I don't waste time. So, if I found management is watching my work, I felt good, at least someone would know that I am working. Otherwise, I never go somewhere and give a list to show what I have done.

Now a day technology improved. Without any warning, the government of any corporation can actually see you, hear you and follow you. My question is: if they are biased and form the wrong impression of me, or do anything wrong to me, who will fix it? How much do I support being watched 24 hours a day?

People ask for favors, do they do the same?

 When money issues are added to anything, things change dramatically. Previously, people used to share pictures, videos, or blog posts just to share their ideas and have fun with friends. 

Then the money issue was added, and now everyone wants more views to earn money.

People keep requesting to view and subscribe. It's not like, if you like something, then you will subscribe. It's like just subscribe to help me earn money.

Many people ask me to join their page or subscribe. Mostly, I avoid. Sometimes it's difficult to avoid, so I just join. I don't want to create more issues in life.

I have a Facebook account, a Facebook page, an Instagram account, a Blogger's blog, and YouTube videos. Before you demand to visit your page regularly, like, comment, subscribe and post over there, why don't you do the same with me? Never felt like that?

Be yourself

 What is meant for you will be yours. So, no need to worry about anything. Just be yourself. Try to fix things that you don't want in yourself. Try to make yourself better little by little. No need to worry about what others are feeling, just be yourself and try to enjoy every moment.

Yes, that is me. That's my attitude.

Be the best version of yourself. People have different choices; they might like you or not. You are not a pizza that everybody will like.

Your surroundings

 Every person is different than others. When we choose people to be with, we have different reasons for doing so. I have seen some people notice the powerful person in the room and then sit or stand beside them. Another group chooses who their friend is; some choose who has more money; some choose who is in their family; some choose who is more beneficial or more beautiful.

What do I choose? I tried to figure out who likes me more. At least some kind of likeness, or less hateness. It's difficult. Most of the time, I am surrounded by people who don't want me. And I am living in this situation always.

Sometimes I clearly understand people around me just want to get rid of me. Well, what I can do, I don't have any other options. If I had, I wouldn't bother any person in this world. Trust me.

No funny comment.

 I have to hold myself back from making a funny comment on anyone. Maybe because of my serious face, people take things seriously. So, when I say something funny about them, they don't get the funny part. They take that seriously and most of the time get offended.

Only people who know me very well know how funny I am. Only they laugh out of their hearts.

Anyway, I think I have already disheartened two of my colleagues. May Allah help me. I am going to hold my tongue forever, and keep remembering myself, no fun, no funny comment. I don't afford to make more enemies in my life.

Suggesting people

 You can suggest someone to do something that will be good for everybody, especially for that person. If they listen, great; if not, it's their luck. You tried, but they are not ready to have that.

But if that person is someone near you, you can't just let things go. You keep asking, requesting, reminding them again and again. Some may call it nagging. But you just want good for them and all. You just have to keep trying with the hope that someday they will understand or just listen.

A very foggy day.

 It's a very foggy day. Visibility looks 0 to me. Be very careful on the road. If not needed, don't go out. Enjoy your Sunday.

I remember I was going to Cox's Bazar from Dhaka on a very foggy day by bus. Our bus driver was saying, I can't see anything. But he started driving. Then he started following a bus. He said, "Let's follow this bus." If this bus falls into a hole, then I will be careful about it. He was laughing with his helper. I had no idea what was going on. Later, the driver found the tricks. He started driving by himself and sped up. I still don't know what his trick was. But he didn't kill us, this much I can assure you.

Food in Europe

I have started to taste the food from the Swish Airline. I liked the food they served. I found they are not processed and have good taste and quality.

I have tasted food in some European countries, like Switzerland, Germany, Italy, and France. I found that food in Switzerland is very expensive but of good quality. In Italy and France, food is much cheaper than in Canada. But the quality of food is much better. In these two countries, you can find a variety of cultural foods, including Halal options, that are affordable and of good quality.

I wish food prices would go down and stay at a reasonable level. Then people would have to buy more healthy food and stay healthy in life. Healthy people mean a good workforce for the country and less pressure on hospitals and care homes. People might have visited more restaurants. The food, restaurant and grocery business would have done better. Moreover, the travellers would have come to visit more to have a wide variety of food in Toronto.

The most important factor for any area

 I have visited many countries, cities, and homes. One thing I realize everywhere is that you need to keep your area clean. No matter how many other things, like tidiness, expensive items, facilities, or other services you have, if the area or items aren't clean, nothing is worth it.

You need to keep the area, living space, furniture, clothes, and other items clean. My suggestion is to appoint a cleaner, maybe to clean once a day or 24/7 availability. It's good for everybody who lives or has just visited for hours. Everybody will feel comfort. It will also reduce the risk of contracting any diseases.

To keep any area clean, we need to stop making it dirty. People who live in and visit the area should keep it clean. It will help to keep the area comfortable for all. 

From school, kids should learn about it too. So that they will keep the area clean by disposing of garbage in the proper place and cleaning the washroom before they leave, etc.

When you compare a person with an animal

 If you call someone an animal, they will get angry. However, if you call them a tiger or a lion, they will love it, because tigers and lions are famous for their bravery, not cruelty.

If you call anyone an elephant, they won't like it. No matter how intelligent and strong this animal is, people refer to it as a fat animal.

Similarly, the peacock is often seen as a symbol of beauty, whereas people often think of a crow as ugly. In fact, a crow is a very intelligent bird with a long-term memory and is socialized with other crows.

So, it doesn't matter what the animal is capable of; animals are liked or disliked by previous means of human society.

Responsibility attracts me

Situation 1:

 I was working with Election SK as an information officer. I arrived at my designated voting place a little early to set up my workstation. I found that my colleagues had also arrived on time, meaning a little early. Everyone met and created a friendly environment.

In the meantime, an older man arrived. He was responsible for the building authority. He came to help us set up the voting place. He came up to me and said, "I assume you are the manager by watching your work, so let's discuss some formal issues."

I smiled and told him, no I am not the manager. But I can help him as much as possible. Then I took him to the manager.

Situation 2:

I worked at McDonald's as a crew member. I worked at the front, taking orders, making coffee, setting up front stations for tea, coffee, and other items, helping clients place their orders, and, if there were delays, contacting the back kitchen to resolve issues. Sometimes, clients also suggested that others contact me with their problems, and they had faith that I would do something for them. I always tried.

A guy came and said, I assume you are the manager, judging by the way you are dressed and how you are managing everything. So, I need to discuss a couple of things about this branch. I replied that I am not, but I can ask the manager to contact you.

Situation 3:

I was studying at the University of Dhaka. My older sister had been admitted to the same university 3 years earlier. Then I joined. One day, I came home early. My father asked me where my sister was. I said I didn't know. My parents knew we were in different departments, but my dad still got angry with me. He said I should take care of my sister. How could I just leave her alone at the university? I started thinking, who was supposed to take care of whom? But our departments were in different locations, so it was impossible to track each other's positions back then. We didn't have cell phones.

Nowadays, I am trying to change my attitude. Let's not take any responsibility and enjoy relaxing time. Let's try.

Our thought process

 When we hear something good about someone, the first thing that comes to mind is how they achieved it and why we can't. This is not good. Let's think about it in another way. Let's learn to be happy for others' achievements. That won't make us any less than others. It will make us happy and give us the opportunity to learn from others and grow.

Successful business

 Do you know who the successful businessmen are? They are the ones who never solve the problems; moreover, sometimes they encourage the problems to keep their business running smoothly.

An example is road construction. You will find that ancient roads don't need any repair; they are still functional. But modern roads need fixing every year or month. So, the maintenance or construction business keeps going. 

Another example is diseases. As long as it exists, you have to pay for the treatment.

We may say this is unethical, but businesspeople will argue that this is business tact and the way to become rich by hurting innocent people.

I hope they find a proper way to make a profit without harming anyone or leaving the problem unresolved.

Campaign in Bangladesh

 In Bangladesh, tradition/benefit is that when you want to campaign for anything, it could be a business product or any kind of election or services, you can use anything in this country without any permission. Treaditionally it is accepted by the people of this country.

Like, you can write about the campaign, or colour or decorate any wall, like a personal home, office buildings, or any shop. You can put your information on any tree, lamp post, public transport, etc. Especially during elections, the campaign party decorates the whole city. Like they own it.

Forgive them

 There are many times in your life when others' actions upset you and cause suffering. You may react instinctively in the moment. Usually, you'll find that your reaction worsens the situation. Sometimes it might improve the situation, but it can also ruin your mood or damage your relationships with others.

If you say nothing, it might burn you inside and ruin your day. It could also give you a headache.

The best option I see is to forgive them, and also forgive yourself. You'll find you can handle everything better now. With peace of mind, you might discover a better way to solve or reduce the problem, or you will simply be able to ignore it for your own mental peace.

My style

 This is my relaxed way of sitting on a chair. I am still trying to remember to sit straight to keep my backbone aligned.

Marriage ceremony

 Bangladesh has a tradition of celebrating marriage ceremonies, as do many other countries. There are some common steps that everyone follows, some inherited from family or community, to ensure everyone can enjoy the celebration. They spend days celebrating at various locations and months preparing, depending on their budget or capabilities.

We received many invitations to join marriage ceremonies. In most cases, my mom didn't want to go because we didn't have a car at that time. Most ceremonies end late at night, making it very difficult to find a ride back home. Uber wasn't available then.

Even if we attend the ceremony, my parents just eat food and then go back home. I haven't had the chance to see any of the activities at the ceremony. I have asked them many times, but they never listen to me.

I regretted it to my friends and said I really wanted to see all the activities of a marriage ceremony. They laughed at me. They said, " You will see when your ceremony occurs." Allah knows that was a disaster.

My friend Shumi helped me fulfill this wish. She invited me to her house to stay for three days and participate in all the ceremonial activities. Well, it wasn't really an option. She ordered me to do so. I stayed with her family for three days and watched all the programs. Shumi and her family took very good care of me—more than the bride herself. They constantly checked whether I had eaten or was facing any problems. Even though Shumi was sitting as the bride, she asked her mother to check whether I had eaten anything. It was a wonderful memory for me.

During my marriage ceremony, no one looked after me like that. Everyone at my ceremony was busy eating. No one fed me. By the end, there was a shortage of seating, and people faced trouble because of the limited availability. My sister's in-laws were also invited to the ceremony. They managed to set up a new table in my room (the bride's room) and sat there to eat. Boro apa (my brother-in-law's older sister) suddenly noticed I was sitting alone. She asked, "Did you eat anything?" I said no. So, she fed me 2 or 3 bites of rice from her hand. In the meantime, the groom's family arrived at the ceremony, so she stopped. Then, they started causing trouble because of the food shortage. The restaurant was very slow, and they caused such delays in arranging the food that everyone became very angry.

A person from the groom's family came to me and asked, "Did you eat food?" I replied, "Yes" (I had taken 2 or 3 bites). She said, "What kind of bride are you? How could you eat before the groom's lunch?" Then she went to the groom's family and kept saying, "What kind of bride is this?" Just to let you know, generally, the bride's family feeds the bride earlier because she may feel shy to eat anything with the groom.

My youngest sister came to me and said that the groom and his friends are also causing a scene. They didn't like the food that was served, so they are demanding something else. I saw from the window how the groom and his friends got up from their tables and walked to another table to eat more, showing their anger.

At the end of the day, my mom came and said they were going to eat now and asked if I wanted to eat. I have seen enough to feel eat anything, so I said no.

Anyway, as I already declared, I have eaten. No one offered me food after arriving at the groom's family's house. I think I enjoyed enough food at my marriage ceremony. I don't even know what the food will look like at my wedding.

Biye Bareer khabar (Food from the marriage ceremony)

 In Bangladesh, the food arrangements for the marriage ceremony are considered the best. People say that the food is comparable to what is served at a marriage, which helps you understand how good it is. As they say, the chicken roast from the biye barir (the home where the marriage is taking place) is especially delightful.

Sometimes I hear Bangladeshi people say, 'It's been a long time since I attended or ate at a wedding.' They miss the food. I also miss that food too.

Sometimes people get upset because they are not invited to a wedding. In most cases, they are not upset about missing the ceremony but about the food.

I heard people comparing or judging the food arrangement at a marriage ceremony. They said that the food wasn't cooked enough, didn't taste good, or that somewhere else was great, etc. They judge the bride's parents for not arranging a good marriage ceremony or food arrangement.

In my childhood, I enjoyed the marriage ceremony programs and food as well. They looked very delightful. After growing up, I realized how difficult and costly it is for a bride's parent to arrange everything. It requires time, money, energy, and people's judgments, especially from the groom's family. On the other hand, no matter how poorly the groom's family arranges the program, the bride's family can never speak badly, or they will make the bride's life difficult.

I think we should all be thankful to the bride's family regardless of how they arrange the ceremony. We should appreciate their effort and accept all mistakes and poor decisions. It's not only for the bride's family; anyone who arranges food for you, don't judge them, and try to enjoy the food and moments with them.

Eid Mubarak