Biography 04: Names

 

I have born in Springtime. In Bangladesh, during Spring Shimul flower or Bombax ceiba commonly known as cotton flower blooms. This is a big tree and the flower’s colour is red. When the flower blooms no leaf stays and you can see only red. Later flowers produce cotton. Which used for making cushion locally.

 

Maybe on the basis of that my mom (May be) kept my name Shimul. Still, my family and relatives call me with this name. In my first passport, my name was Shimul Sultana. Later my youngest grandfather (Maternal, my mom’s youngest uncle) give me a new name “Shahana”. So, then I became Shahana Sultana. If I translate this name, it will be “Queen Princess”. This name didn’t continue for long. Before I get admitted to grade two in Bangladesh, my mom did the final change. She added my father’s name to me. So, from then I became Shahana Shafiuddin.

“At the end, love wins”

 

Really? How many times you have seen this winning?

I have seen so many times, people fall in love, willing to do anything for their lovers. But in the end, they get refused. Their feelings were very true (I think), they just choose the wrong person to fall in.

 

When people near me did this. In the beginning, I had tried to warn them, that they should know, to what kind of person they are getting close. If they could stop, it would have been better for them. But even by knowing everything, they fall for it. On those days I didn’t know, why on earth they are even trying for that kind of people.

 

But with time, I realize, they did because they couldn’t stop themselves. Because of love, they always had hope, people will change, and fall for real with them. And that never happens, so, in the end, get hurt.

 

Later these broken heart people move on. They start their new life. But I felt the spark is missing. It looks like they are living with furniture. I hope, I’m wrong.

 

Almost all of them, who play with heart, didn’t get anything good (As far as I have seen). Karma is very true. No matter how they appear in society, deep inside they are living the worst life.

Biography 3 (Summery):

 

When I first started writing in this blog, I had decided, I won’t hesitate to write anything over here. Mostly it’s not a popular blog, I don’t need to worry. But, on Facebook, I always try to give happy news. 

Then I realize, I can’t hurt anyone. So, I must write in a way so that no one can specify who that person is. If I can’t sugar-coat, I will hide the story.

 

As I have started writing about me (Kind of biography), no one needs to worry. It will be only about me, with some unknown persons around me.

Every individual deserves this privacy

If anyone ever liked me, maybe only for some moments. They earned lifetime respect from me. I honour them. Theses feelings are priceless.

 

When any person directly or indirectly expressed their feeling to me, I had never disclosed it to any other person. None of my best friends, mom or sisters know about them. I believe every person deserves this privacy.

 

You have every right, not to love any person. But you have no right to make a joke about their feelings.

Biography 2: skin color

I have born at Dhaka Medical College. After getting birth, the doctor hit me to cry. To clear my vocal. My dad didn’t like that. So, to annoy him doctor kept hitting me and I kept crying. My dad couldn’t stop himself but to ask the doctor to stop. They laughed. Till now I found some people hurt me without any reason, just to enjoy.

 

My mom was happy to see me. Because she saw I didn’t take my father’s skin colour. My skin colour was white. As she told me that I had the brightest skin colour among all brothers and sisters (I doubt). But I couldn’t keep her happy for a long time. By 3 years I became just like my father. Quite dark skin.

 

In Bangladesh, people called me, black skin. But they always tried to make it sugar-coated. Like, you are black, but there is something attractive at your face, which makes people look at you, black rose etc.

 

I am not conscious of my skin colour. I rarely look at the mirror. So, most of the time I forget what my skin colour is. During my teenage, I noticed, all colour dresses aren’t looking good at me. I had to avoid some colours which make me look worse.

 

My skin colour became the most important thing in life, when I had started to think to marry. I know I'm not beautiful. But I didn't know I am that much ugly. For example, I'm giving you two comments, ugly girls like me always try to catch beautiful boys otherwise no one will marry them, My face looks so dirty I don't wash my face after getting up in the morning.

But I never tried to hide my colour. I even don’t put makeup on my face (Actually I even don’t know how to put on makeup, I don’t have any). I think, my face has different shades of colours, I don’t need to put more colours on it.

 

After arriving in Canada, I got to know, my skin colour is brown. But one day, one of my teachers told me, you are black. I didn’t hear like that for a long time. Then I looked at him and saw he is from Latin America. His skin colour is yellowish-white and very beautiful. So, obviously, my skin is very dark in his eyes. I didn’t mind, if he thinks like that, he has the right to let me know that.

 

I know, not only for my skin colour but because of the way I look, many people don’t like me. Some of them can’t hide it. It’s ok not to like me. But I am what I am, and I think I am a very good person to hang out with.

Difference between like and love

There is a very fine layer in between love and like. The easy to figure it out is to monitor how feeling growing with time.

 

If you want anything more and more. Then it’s love. It never dies. If, after having some you are feeling full, don’t want it more, then it was your liking.

 

Let me give you some examples. A kid wants a toy very much. They are asking the toy for months. They are so desperate to have it. After having it, within 3 days, they don’t feel any interest in it. It’s liking.

Some kids like their soft toys very much. They hold it every night before going to sleep. It continues, this is love.

 

In a relationship, I have seen this in many couples. At the beginning they are so happy to have each other, then they lost all interest with each other. Maybe they liked each other very much, but they didn’t love their partner. So, it ended in a very short time.

 

For some, without making much effort the feeling continues. Yes, it’s love. They might face many ups and downs in life, but the feeling continues.

People, with a heart like an ocean

Some people born in this world with a heart like an ocean. They love people, animals or anything else. Till death, they work for their love and work. Because of them, humankind takes a leap of growth. When general people get love and mercy from them, they don’t think to give anything in return. People just take advantage of these big hearts, because people think these big persons are fools to let’s take advantage of it.

We all have seen a person like this in our life. Did we do anything for them? Deep in their heart, don’t you think they wish for anything? Yes, they do, they just can’t expect it from people who don’t give the value of others work.

A beautiful song "tare hai barati"

I like this song. I think it's a happy song, but it started as a sad one. After watching this song I started feeling a marriage ceremony open air at night would be amazing.

https://youtu.be/DsltGzipmyo

Lyrics:

Akhiyan milake channa paave na judai ve

Now that our eyes have met, let us never be apart

Akhiyan milake channa paave na judai ve

Now that our eyes have met, let us never be apart

Deve na tari mainu sari khudai ve

I won't exchange you even for the entire world

Akhiyan milake

Now that our eyes have met Tare hai barati chandni hai yeh barat The stars are our guests and the moonlight is the wedding procession Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Tare hai barati chandni hai yeh barat The stars are our guests and the moonlight is the wedding procession Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Tare hai barati chandni hai yeh barat The stars are our guests and the moonlight is the wedding procession Ganga Jamuna se bhi pawan tera mera bandhan Our bond is more pure than the Ganga and Jamuna rivers Tera prem hai phulwari aur mera mann hai aangan Your love is a flower plant and my heart is like fertile land Janamo janamo ka hi sajni tera mera saath We'll be together for multiple births Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Tu hai jeevan mein joh pritam sukh nahi maangun duja I don't need any more happiness now that you're there in my life Aarti naino se karti hoon mann se teri puja I worship you with my eyes and pray to you from my heart Main toh dharm hi samjhun teri kahi hui har baat Everything you say is righteous to me Saaton phere honge ab haathon mein leke haath Now we'll walk the seven holy steps with our hands held together Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Jeevan saathi hum, diya aur baati hum We're life partners just like the lamp and the wick Tare hai barati chandni hai yeh barat The stars are our guests and the moonlight is the wedding procession Akhiyan milake channa paave na judai ve Now that our eyes have met, let us never be apart Deve na tari mainu sari khudai ve I won't exchange you even for the entire world Akhiyan milake Now that our eyes have met

Simple delicious rice

How to cook delicious rice in a simple way? You will need

1.      Rice cooker (Optional)
2.        Rice 3 cups (Amount is your choice)
3.        A can of vegetable soup
4.        Water
5.        Pinch of salt (If you feel to add some)

Now follow the steps:

1         Wash the rice 3 times
2.       Put it in the rice cooker’s bowl
3.       Open your soup can and pour it into the bowl
4.       Add water till it just crosses the bar of 3 cups
5.       If you want to add salt, then you can
6.       Close the lid and turn on the cooker.

7.       And the end you will have a bowl of fragrant rice. It will be somewhat like vegetable Polao.

My Biography 1: The Birth

I have born in the Bhuiya family of Bikrompur. They were the Nobab in past. My mom came from Munsi family. They were very well educated. I was the second child of my family. My sister came first in this world.

When my mom got pregnant for the second time, she was doing a full-time job and was working overtime. Because she needed money to support her in-law's big family. My father was doing a government job, he wasn’t earning enough to support his family. But mom couldn’t continue working too much in her pregnancy. The doctor told her to take a leave and stay at home. She did. But in Bangladesh, a woman can’t take rest when her mother in law is working. So, she continued to work at home. The result was obvious. She lost her second child.

Now you know, technically I wasn’t the second child of my family. I came on this earth when she became pregnant for the third time. This time doctor said to my mom, “If you lost this child, you can’t be a mom ever.” My mom took the challenge to keep me.

Our traditional in-law family didn’t like this attitude. Why a bride will lay on the bed and take rest? But this time my mom stood against all of them. My dad was the youngest son of the family. He generally didn’t say much in front of all family members. But silently he agrees with his mom and my mom became the worst person in the family. They give her punishment for this, but that is another story. Because of my mom’s strong decision, I survived. And they had got their second child, me.

Now a day, I think, maybe that’s why I became like this. I listen to all, try to adjust as much as possible. I tolerate a lot. But when I made any decision, that’s final. Now nothing can change it.

As a young father, my dad wasn’t good at the newborn child. He didn’t hold my elder sister much. But from my very childhood, I started smiling. No one could resist that, neither my father. He used to take me in his lap and travel in the neighbourhood. I keep laughing with my toothless face and everybody adores it. Yes, I use to gain people’s hearts. Because of me, my father started enjoying his fatherhood.

I didn’t take much time to learn to speak. After learning to speak, I didn’t like to keep my mouth shut. I was surrounded by Dhaka’s original people. So, I learned the local Dhakaiya language. When my mom took me to my grand parent’s house (Faridpur) all local area people came to visit me. To listen to my speaking. I keep speaking, telling stories to my grandfather. All the village people enjoyed and laugh with my grandfather. Here I can inform you that my grandfather was my first lover. He used to sing this song “Pakhir basar moto duti chokh tomar, thik jeno natorer bonolota shen (Your eyes are like the bird nest…)”. I thought bird nest is an ugly thing, why my eyes will be like that? I told him not to sing this for me, but he always sang it and made me angry.

When I learned some poems. My mom recorded a few of them in a cassette. She knew, with time I will change, and she was right. Now a day, I speak too little. From everywhere I have got complaints, that I don’t speak.