Having control over food

I like food. But I always try to have control on it. Like I drink two cups of tea daily. It doesn’t mean I don’t want to take more, but you know, I can’t make it as an addiction. Sometimes I drink coffee. Again, not more than one cup/mug in a day. My home country is Bangladesh. So, obviously my main food is rice. But I take it in certain amount and once in a day.

I break this food rule only in Eid days. On those days, I just eat, as much as I want… so, whole year, I wait for Eid days.

We should consider this situation

Meat is a very good source of protein. So, in hospitals, we should have Halal meat option. Because Muslim patients can’t take general meat.

When I was in the hospital, I had been served Turkey sandwich, which I couldn’t take because it wasn’t Halal. But I could take the veg muffin.

Can’t expect to have anyone in life, forever.

You can’t depend on someone or something by hoping that the person or the thing will be there for you, forever. In my childhood whenever I was in pain, I use to run to the window. There was a tree beside the window. My silent friend, who was always there for me, always listened what I said, never left. I used to talk with it silently. I believed; it was listening to me. Many times, I sat beside it when tears were falling from my eyes. It was there, I felt at least someone is there sitting beside me. I thought after my death, may be only the tree will remember me.

After some years, our neighbor cut that big tree, to make a big apartment. I surprised; it went out before me! I also learned; I can’t depend on anyone that they will stay with me for ever.

I can talk, when I know the person is listening.

I don’t like to talk to any angry person. I better stay silent and let them think that they win. Sometimes I just say OK/Yes to make them calm down.

In a conversation, if the other person gets angry, I can feel that the person is not able to think properly or give me a logical answer. They will just argue to win to feel better. I don’t want to argue a person like that.

I can only talk, when I know the person is listening. They might agree with me or not. They will have a good logic behind that, and they will express that nicely.

Haters shouldn’t be responsible for health care.

I think, there is a major problem in Saskatoon hospitals. I went to the hospital about 3 times in 4 years. And I have seen it every time. There must be something that needs to improve.

I had unbearable pain in stomach, I went to the ER in the hospital. There I had to wait for 4 hours with this pain before doctor can see me. While I saw a man vomiting continuously with headache and other people was suffering from other problems. I have also seen nurses and doctors were making jokes and having fun together right beside these patients. They were laughing loudly. I never felt such helpless like that. You are lucky that you don’t have any problem, but you should respect other’s situation. At least in front of them.

You know what, this is not even the main problem that I am going to mention.

I saw, police bring a lady. Probably she had been raped. Police put their own jacket on her to cover her body. On the way to the operation theater one doctor was laughing and saying to the police, “Why didn’t you put her bigger jacket? It’s their right!” Then again, he laughed out loud. Police didn’t say anything, just smiled. The lady was an aboriginal.

My son was coughing with blood. We took him to the hospital. The doctor came, he was behaving very rude with my 9-year-old son, the way he was asking questions, like he was scolding him. Right beside my son’s bed, there was a same age white boy. The doctor was very nice and polite with him. We are the immigrant from Bangladesh.

I was lying in a bed at the emergency room’s corridor. I was in pain and feeling cold, but no body gave me any cushion or blanket on me. After hours one nurse noticed my condition and gave me pillow and blanket.

After 2.5 years, I was having breathing problem. I was lying at emergency room, attaching with heart and pressure monitor. Because of my problem monitor was beeping. An old lady was there beside my bed. She felt disturbed for that beeping. So, she called a nurse and asked, “Is it my monitor that is beeping”. The white male nurse said, “No, it hers”. Then he came to my area and turned off the beeping. Like if anything goes wrong with me, it won’t beep, and I may die. That’s OK, but no white people should get disturb. Later when things go worse, I had to call a passer by and ask my nurse to come and check me. She came and give me medicine with doctor’s concern and turned all machine on again.

Later when I get release, I wanted to talk with my doctor about medicine. That white nurse said, “You can take Advil Strength, if you have problem again”. I went to Walmart next day and found that Advil Strength has Gelatin, which is not Halal and we Muslims avoid it. He knew it, because I was wearing Hijab/covering my head with head scarf.

I think this mentality won’t change in a day. We need to do some workshop with health region employees including doctor’s and nurses to minimize this problem. Haters shouldn’t be responsible for health care.

Group travel vs traveling alone

I believe everything has a positive side. For example, you may like to see new places on this Earth. So, you travel. And you know very well that because of your travel partner, your travel experience may differ.

You may travel with different groups. Then you will find, travel experience with each group is different.

When you travel any place with a group, even in an unattractive place, you will find it funny only because you are with a bunch of people. If you are traveling alone, then the place must have something to make you happy.

Again, if you are traveling in a group, you must adjust with everything with the group. In some cases, for a very small reason you my get hurt or someone may get hurt because of you. If you are traveling alone, you don’t have to worry about anything. But sometimes you may feel lonely.

Any group work means you must face more trouble and will have more fun. Alone work means less trouble, less fun.

Now choice is yours. It depends on how much you can adjust with others to have fun 😉

Using bug spray in summer

In Canada, people, who lives long are mostly from Saskatchewan. They live more than 100 years. We can assume this area has the healthiest environment in the country. As far as I understand this area doesn’t have industries like other big cities. Here mostly we have prairie fields with crops.

No wonder, in the healthy area’s bugs will be also be very healthy. When I first came here, I surprised by watching the size of mosquitoes. They are big, and if you have one bite, you will feel it for days.

So, in summer, no matter where you go out, in a park, beside the river or just to visit your neighbor, I will suggest you, put some bug spray before you leave. Especially to kids.

How to make people listen

When you are in management, you must know how to make people work, what needed to be done. Sometimes you will feel that if you do it, it will be done in much better way. But remember, you have limited time, you have another task to do. And, other people also must learn to work.

It’s not easy to make people work in time and efficiently. Some people are very honest and dedicated in their work. If you teach them how the work supposes to be done, they will always follow that. But some are not like that. They may don’t want to follow your instruction, want to put you down, or just lazy.

 Some people don’t need to be told, they know what they must do, and they make it happen. Again, some people are not like that, you must ask them to do it, other wise they will think, you didn’t notice so they can escape the work.

Some listen after one reminding. Some need to be told again and again. Few people are more disturbing, you must work them, other wise they won’t work.

As a manager you must know, with whom you can relay. It’s difficult to run a business with lazy and dishonest people. But this is the real world, you must live with them.

Personally, I don’t like to ask people more than once to do any task. Especially at home, I ask once. If that person listens, fine. Otherwise If I can make time, I will do it by myself, if can’t then let it be unfinished.

In work, I will suggest finding a way, which people will listen, try to change work responsibility, add some reward. I listen to people, so that they will listen to me too. These tips may work.

Friend, for ever

I always wanted a friend, who’s brain IQ will be matched with mine. I like intelligent people. No, there won’t be any test. You can feel this, when you talk with someone. Someone makes you feel that you can talk about anything with them, you can share any good or bad news, that person can help you or at least give you suggestion. That person will be there for you always. You can call that person anytime, anywhere by asking for help or just for hangout.

But in real life, the people who were in that position, didn’t stay, didn’t tell me why they left. I assume I had irritated them too much or couldn’t full fill their expectation.

So bottom line is, I don’t have any best friend.

Rule followers face more trouble

I always follow rules. Like driving rules, school rules, work area rules, meeting rules etc. I try to follow all given procedure. I believe rules has been made to make good for all and for safety.

But the way I am finding myself in trouble. I think, may be because I am following rules too much. I have seen people who just pass rules for their own benefit, they make things easy for them and live happy. No one can put them in trouble.

Though I am not going to change, I will be honest always. It just hurts me.

Easy rule for love

If you love someone, that’s great.

If that person didn’t love you back, even better.

Let them go, set yourself free from them and enjoy your life 100%.

May be someday the person who truly loves you will be with you.

If you think you can’t live without them,

Then go and get them.

Keep trying, never give up. Probably you will have them.

If not, then after death, at least you can say, I tried.

Friends who left

If you found your friend leave you, just because they had heard something from outside. Didn’t care to talk with you. Then trust me, they never meant for you. The truth is outsiders rescued you by taking them from you. There is a saying,” It’s better to have intelligent enemy than a stupid friend”

How could he think like that?

Once in a week my son attends the “Electric club” in his school. Now a day he is making traffic light with a battery. Didn’t get chance to see it as he said, he still has a little to finish it up.

Today he had the electric club day, so I didn’t show up in his school to pickup him on regular time. I was planning to go 45 minutes later, to give him enough time to complete his work in the club. After 30 minutes I have got a call from school. Shafeen called me, “Where are you?”.

I: “I am at home”

Son: “Why didn’t you come to pickup me?”

I: “Today you have the electric club, didn’t you go there?” (I was thinking he might have forgotten to go to that room)

Son: “No, that class has been canceled” (Previously, whenever this club class canceled, his class teacher emailed me. Today I didn’t get any news)

I: “OK, I am on my way. From next, if you have any class dismissed, please call me immediately.”

Son: “OK”

While I was driving back him to home, I asked, “What did you think, when you didn’t see me on time?” I was assuming he might though I am in trouble.

Son: “I THOUGHT YOU FORGET TO PICKUP ME”

I started thinking, how could he think like that. I never forget to pickup him up. How could he come up with this idea!

By force

I don’t like to have anything by force, not even my rights. I know, this is not good for anyone. I don’t want anybody to be like that. Things that naturally comes to me, I enjoy that.

I like to be relaxed and have a peaceful life. I know this is not heaven. I am never going to have a life like that. Everyday I found new problems in my life, when I already have previous unsolved situations. But still I am trying my best to achieve everything smoothly.

Eating and sleeping

My mom uses to say, “Eating and sleeping, these two habits will increase as much as you let it and will decrease as much as you control it.”

I found it true, in most cases. Though, if I’m assured that I can eat my favorite foods as much as I want, no harm will happen, I think, I can eat like a rhinoceros and sleep like lioness.

But you know, that’s not true. After making a good food and sleep habit, you won’t feel good to make any indiscipline in your life. And when you see yourself better, feel better, you will continue doing like that.

Still I don’t want to change my food habit, no interest in exercise. I have no hope to look better :)

School bus only for French medium school students

We are living in Saskatoon, Canada. My kid is in elementary public school. We had to walk 20 minutes to go to school from our apartment. From the beginning I wanted to send my kid to school by bus. The school authority directly told me the school buses are only for French medium students. So, from our apartment another kid used to take bus for school and my kid had to walk on snow, -40 c temperature to go to school.

This is not fair. If you have shortage of school bus, then according to distance kids suppose to be picked. If you only choose French medium students, then this is kind of racism. There can be other good reason to run buses like this, which I don’t know.

Nice words

As far as I have seen, general people all over the world are nice. When people say small nice words, that made your day. Sometimes you know that those are not 100% true, just said to make you feel better. But still, it works.

I was looking for a t-shirt. The ail where I was standing was for XL size body. An elderly woman came and told me, “I think you are looking for your dress in wrong ail, you should go to medium size ail.” No doubt, she had made my day.

I was traveling on the bus. A guy came to me and said, “You must be going to the college for study, young lady”. Yes, that made me feel good too.

A guy told me, “Oh you are from Bangladesh, I have met other Bangladeshi girls too, you all are very beautiful”, I knew very well, he said that just to make me feel good. And it worked.

So, I believe whenever you talk, use nice words. You never how your simple effort can bring smile to other’s face.

Messy

I live with two boys. There is a saying, boys will be boys. This is very true in my life. No matter how hard I try, they always make our house a mess. After cleaning and putting everything in its proper place, if I let them stay at home for 5 minutes, they will totally change the look. Any outsider who visits the house at that moment can never guess these were in condition just 5 minutes ago.

My son looks like his dad, and I am so happy about that. I don’t want to hear from my in-laws that my son doesn’t look good because he has my face.

Anyway, my husband will say he is messy because, from his childhood, he has been like that; it’s his habit. But I have trained my son well. From the very childhood, I always made him put his clothes in the right place. He did, but now, why did he become so messy? For example, I found his socks in every single room of our house which was supposed to be with his shoes. Whenever he returns from outside, I ask him to put his socks into his shoes. He replied, Yes, yes. Then, I don’t know what happened; I found him thinking about something or singing along and walking through the rooms with socks. Then, he doesn’t even know where he kept the socks.

Sometimes, it’s difficult to understand who can mess up the houses more, the other or the son.

This was just an example; these two boys are doing it with everything. I am tired, and I surrender. I can’t make this house better. It will always be a mess.

Sewing

Shafeen has drawn this picture

I believe that, if you take training or learn anything, that won’t get wasted. In your life, somehow it will help you, directly or indirectly. Let me give you an example. In my school, there was a subject on sewing. In most schools, there is no class like that. Maybe principals don’t think it's a necessary class. But trust me, this simple class helped me a lot. Generally, I don’t throw out clothes unless it's not fixable.

I didn’t know that anybody noticed me doing this sewing or fixing clothes. One day I was talking with my younger brother about his trousers. I told him that it tore too much, he must give it up. He replied, of course not, you can fix it. 

After passing a long time, I was talking with my son that I need some new dresses to wear at home. He replied, why? you can fix your old ones.

Maybe people have trust in my capability more than I have.

Now a day I became so busy that I can’t make time for sewing. There are now piles of cloth to fix. I am trying to take some time for those dresses.

Some people are not ready take help

Sometimes it is very difficult to help stupid people. Please don’t get me wrong, I am a stupid too. But that’s not my today’s topic.

No matter how many times, how many ways you help a stupid, they will always feel doubt on you. And they will believe in their enemy who make them happy with some sweet words. Some people just don’t want to see who are actually always been there for them, they just carry out with their feelings.

In these cases, you can only watch and say, I tried but you are not ready to take my help