Like every small girl, I like crockery. I mean I still like them. When I was a kid, whenever I went to buy toys, I uses to buy crockeries. I liked to play with them. Now I have my own kitchen. I still like to have different kitchen items. But I am living in a rented apartment. So, I am holding myself not to buy more.
Papor bhaja, papadum or papad is a very common dish in India. It's mainly a snack. It could be given with the main dish as an appetizer.
When we were living in Umlez(Saudi Arabia), another Bangladeshi family uses to live in our neighbour. They were in our block. They had a son named Roni. he was younger than me. I think Roni's dad and our dad were working in the same office.
Whenever we visited their house, Roni's mom uses to fry Papor for us. I liked it, it is a crispy snack. She always kept them below the gas burner. I assume to keep them crispy and dry. But then I notice she is giving it every time we visit their house. So, I became bored with this snack. I stopped taking it anymore.
After long years, when I visited Kolkata I went to a South Indian restaurant and they give us the food in a thali. Thali means there were many items of food on the same plate. One item was a Papor. And I liked it very much.
Song: Naam Rekhechhi Bonolata
Cover Artist: Miftah Zaman
Main Artist: Shyamal Mitra
Music Director: Sudhin Dasgupta
Lyricist: Sudhin Dasgupta
[English Translation has given below]
নাম রেখেছি বনলতা
যখন দেখেছি,
হয়তো বা সেই ক্ষণেই
তোমায় ভালবেসেছি। - [ ২ বার ]
When I was in elementary (Primary) school, our class seats were divided into two rows. The left side was for boys and the right side was for girls. Generally, girls uses to play together and boys passes their time in their own way. Most of the boys use to fight, jump, scram a lot. I think, because of this attitude, girls use to avoid them.
I had noticed one boy uses to sit in a corner. I can see he always takes a bath before coming to the school as his hair was wet or had given oil and comb it very properly. He use to study well at home and did his homework. He never tried to make fun with any girls. He was a good boy. Only because of that I like him as a classmate. Or I can say, I felt, he wasn't harmful at all, that makes me safe and happy.
He used to live beside our home. There were some rooms or houses made of brick walls and roofs were made of tin. A couple of families lived there. It was a one-storied building. Now a multi-storied residential building was built in that place.
One day my mom called me. She was standing beside the window. She said, "The mom is beating the boy for a long time very hard. This is how I should beat you". My mom left. I could hear a woman's voice. She was screaming by saying, "How dare he push me, I will smash his balls and so on" and I could hear the noise of beating with "sholar jharu" or coconut broom. I could also hear, Prokash was screaming. I had stood there for a long time. The punishment didn't stop. I came back to my place and it was going on.
I wish I could stop somehow. But in Bangladesh, there is no organization to save abused children from their parents.
Later, when my son started going to school I have felt the same. When we used to come back from school or anytime walked through the apartments I could hear the voice of crying kids. Where parents were beating up their children to study, to make good marks in school. Because it became a high competition era.
Let's come back to Prokash. The next day I saw him in the same place, sitting in a corner, no talking, no jumping around. I felt bad. Now I know why he doesn't feel any interest to do anything.
After a couple of days suddenly he disappeared. I couldn't ask anyone what happen to him. Otherwise, girls would have made jokes about me. Then one day Buri told the girls, Prokash is dead. She also told that he had a stepmom. I had a feeling it was a murder, he can't die all of a sudden.
In Bangladesh, stepmom or dad don't make good relations with their step kids (I am not counting a very few different exceptions). I wish people could love every kid.
I like the melody of this song. I felt it's a deeply romantic song. Then I am thinking maybe this is a sad song. Someone is missing someone and wishing to meet someday...
Lyrics [English translation has given below]:
Saiyaara Lyrics – Mohit Chauhan, Tarannum Malik
Aasmaan Tera Mera Hua
Khwaab Ki Tarah Dhuaan Dhuaan
Aasmaan Tera Mera Hua
Saans Ki Tarah Ruaan Ruaan
Ho Jaaye Jahaan Tu Jaaye
Paaye Mujhe Hi Paaye
Saaye Ye Mere Hain
Tujh Mein Samaaye
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara
Tu Jo Mila Toh Yun Hua
Ho Gayi Poori Adhoori Si Duaa
Tu Jo Gaya Toh Le Gaya Sang Tere
Mere Jeene Ki Har Wajah
Ho Jaaye Jahaan Tu Jaaye
Paaye Mujhe Hi Paaye
Saaye Ye Mere Hain
Tujh Mein Samaaye
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara
Tumpe Miti Tumse Bani
Tumse Hua Hai Haan
Khud Pe Yaqeen
Tu Jo Nahi To Naa Sahi
Main Hoon Yahaan Toh
Tu Hai Yahin Kahin
Ho Jaaye Jahaan Tu Jaaye
Paaye Mujhe Hi Paaye
Saaye Ye Mere Hain
Tujh Mein Samaaye
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara
Saiyaara Main Saiyaara
Saiyaara Tu Saiyaara
Sitaaron Ke Jahaan
Mein Milenge Abb Yaara.
English translation:
your sky, and mine,
has become all smoke, like a dream...
your sky, and mine,
is spread in parts, like breaths...
wherever you go,
you'll find me only...
these shadows of mine are comprised in you...
planet, I'm a planet now...
Planet, you're a planet (too)...
And we shall meet again in the world of stars now...
since you have met, it has so happened,
as if some unheard wish is fulfilled...
as you left, you took with you
every reason for me to live...
wherever you go,
you'll find me only...
these shadows of mine are comprised in you...
planet, I'm a planet now...
Planet, you're a planet (too)...
And we shall meet again in the world of stars now...
I'm sacrificed on you, I am made of you,
(as in, being good due to you)
from you only I have belief in myself...
If I am here,
you're somewhere here only...
wherever you go,
you'll find me only...
these shadows of mine are comprised in you...
planet, I'm a planet now...
Planet, you're a planet (too)...
And we shall meet again in the world of stars now.
[Source: https://lyricstranslate.com, Lyricsbogie.Com]
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I have studied for 3 years in our neighbourhood school. I placed 2nd on the final exam of Grade 2.
The first boy was very popular in the school. Everybody knew he is a very talented boy and looks very cute. I remember one day a parent came to our class to talk to the teacher. They found Sumon who was submitting his classwork to the teacher. They said that he is very cute and hold his chin and smiled at him. In that position, he kept talking with them. I was laughing, they are treating him like a 3 years old boy.
Sumon was very frank with everybody. I mean with both boys and girls. I think he is the only boy to whom we all the girls use to talk. In that school, most of the students were from nearby houses. So, in the afternoon when go out to play, we meet with many of them. One day I and Buri (She is from our class) were talking in the playground. Sumon came to talk with us. I don't remember why both Buri and Sumon started arguing and trying to pull each other's legs. Buri showed Sumon that he has a hole in his shirt near his underarm. Sumon didn't agree to accept it as a fault, he told her that is to get some air inside the body in this hot and humid season. Sumon also told Buri, even she has holes in her dress. Well, there were some, those were frock designs. But Sumon isn't ready to accept that. I remember I was just laughing and listening to their conservation.
One day Sumon declare in the class that he loves Buri. Buri felt really embarrassed. Even when we grow up, I mean when we were in the 10th grade, we use to make fun with Buri by saying Sumon is her soul met.
In Bangladesh, parents always try to put their kids in a better school. On those days in our neighbourhood, there is another school which is known as a better school. So, Sumon's parents moved him to that school from grade 3.
Within a year, we moved to our own house from the rented apartment, in the same area. Then I don't remember after how many years maybe 10 or more, I saw Sumon and his family became our neighbour. We didn't talk but I have seen him a couple of times from our window. Then they moved somewhere else again.
My cousin use to live with us. He knew Sumon. He told me that Sumon has joined the organization directed by professor Abu Syed. My cousin also joined there. Then Sumon's academic results went down. I never expected that. I thought he is a scholar and will always make good academic results.
Then no connection for a long time. One day I found him on a TV program. He was presenting a program related to ghost stories. It was a quite popular program. I understood, he has started showing his quality.
Then again, long time no news of him. I moved to Canada. One day I found him on FB. He is living in the USA with his wife and daughters. Now a day, I can see his talent with his writings on Facebook. He is my only friend who is from grade 2 and which I'm still connected with.
In Islam, this has been told that people should stand shoulder to shoulder in line when they say a prayer together. I assume to increase brotherhood and to decrease differences between everybody this system has been established.
Airplane authorities or builders liked it very much. The way they have put seats inside an airplane that you don't have any other choice but to sit shoulder to shoulder. I mean your shoulder will touch the other person's shoulder when you take a seat. If it is a family member then you will tolerate or enjoy it. But when this happens with strangers then I'm sure everybody won't like it. especially for women, it is very uncomfortable.
Here is the airplane policy, if you don't like this kind of journey, then pay extra and you will get a first-class seat.
In Canada, air tickets are already very high. And service is pretty low. If you travel to other countries with other airplanes you will see, with less money how high quality service has been maintained. Even if you travel through Bangladeshi internal flights, those give much better service than Canadian airplanes.
One option I like is Canadian airplane booking. You can choose which seat you want to sit from online. So, you can have a less expensive seat if you choose to sit near wings or take no food. But again, even the less expensive seat price is too high.
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| One of my childhood picture |
My mom's older sister lived in "ShantiNagar", Dhaka, Bangladesh. We went to their house from South Kamalapur many times. I was too young to remember much. My aunt's house was big. It was a one-storied building. They had an open space in their house. We use to play there with our cousin sisters. My aunt's youngest daughter was our playmate mostly. she was a little younger than my older sister. I mean her age was in between me and my older sister's age. She was a very sweet, friendly and beautiful girl. Everybody liked her because of her beautiful nature. She was more close to my older sister. They were like close friends. For them, I was too young to be close. So, they used to play together mostly. I am as usual alone.
My cousin's name is Dola. She died of cancer when she was just 17 years old. I still remember some of her conversations (I will write about them later). Her mom, my aunt is in Canada now with her other daughter and grandkids.
They had a big TV (According to those days when most of the people doesn't have any). That big tv had a wooden tv stand, it was like a big box with legs. They use to kept the tv inside that box/case. My parent had given them an eagle (Small wooden maybe) to put it on the tv case/box.
This house had a very big kitchen. My aunt and uncle were food lovers. In their house, we had tasted many delicious foods. Though I don't remember any of them.
Later they moved on. But whenever I had visited Shanti Nagar, I always looked for their house. It was just beside the main road of Shantinagar. I have a small part of my childhood memory, in that house.
I went to the orthopedic specialist as my doctor recommended. Like all other doctors first, he thought it's nothing. If I take enough rest, it will go away within 2/3 days. Then he found pain is too much and I am tolerating this for a year. So, he gave me two injections on both my feet and heel. The injection was very painful. When I was in a c-section, the anesthesia person gave me an injection on my bone and said, it will be very painful, I could tolerate it. This time it was more painful and I couldn't resist screaming. The orthopedic specialist also told me to take 4 days rest, take pain killers when it became painful. I have asked the doctor can I drive now, because I have to drive 30 minutes to reach home. He said you have 4 hours before it became too painful.
I rushed back home and told my son, I will take 4 days' rest. Now you are on your own, you will take food on time, do your work on time and take care of yourself (Like taking bath, brushing etc). My son became very happy. I didn't have much hope for his work, but I didn't think he will be this reckless. He expended his four days by playing games on his computer.
I understood, I couldn't teach him anything. He is just following his genome. Now a day whenever he says, mom let me do things in my own way. I told him, you have proven how you do your work. I had given you 4 days. He can't say any more words. He knows what he had done.
In my school, we have fixed colours for the girl's uniforms. By maintaining that colour we can make frock or kameez. My mom made me two uniforms for the school. One was a frock and another one was a kameez. Not literary my mom, a tailor had made it. Girls in my class told me, when I wear the frock, I look a little fat. On those days, I had a slim figure. I don't know why I looked like a fat girl. I was never concern about my beautification. But who wants to be a fat person? So, most of the time I wanted to wear the kameez dress. Though my mom tried to make me understand with frock I look beautiful.
In Saskatchewan, I have seen every water tap has two openers. One is for hot water another one gives chilled one. We had to open both to get the water temperature we want. It's mixed with both tap water to make the one we want. This actually gives little trouble to figure out how to make the perfect temperature water and make more water waste because we mix and test again to change both water flow.
In Ontario, we have one water tap. You can move it around to get the water temperature you want. It is easy to manage and makes less water waste.
In Saskatchewan, the commode flash tank is bigger, which makes more water waste, because you don't need a full tank of water always. In Ontario, they have changed the system. So it flashes less water. If needed you can flash a couple of times. I know, The city of Saskatoon is already thinking to apply that in their city.
In Ontario library has an automated book returning system. I mean you can return your book to a machine. It will immediately check the book and inform you what books it has taken. Saskatoon has an automated book lending system. To return we still just dropped the book in the library.
Saskatchewan doesn't have any streetcar or tram in the city. No underground or sky train. I will say The city of Saskatoon should start plan about it (If they are not already). Because the city is growing. You will need that in future. Why start planning and make it happen now. The city stays under snow most of the time of the year. I believe an underground train will be a good option when roads became very dangerous.
The security guard course is very high in Saskatchewan. Even the exam fee for a driving license is also very high. When another cost of the city is less than Ontario, then why these fees are too high?
Saskatchewan people are very friendly to the new face or stranger. In Ontario, if you say "Hi" to a stranger, that person will be suspicious and won't answer you.
Saskatchewan people expect a welcome greet from any shopping mall. People get upset if no one welcomes them properly. In Ontario, nobody bothers about it.
The Fall is very colourful in Saskatchewan, mostly the trees become yellow and orange coloured. Ontario has more red in the colour.
Though both provinces are in Canada, both of them have many dissimilarities.
I had got punished several times in this school in grade 2. In those days (Maybe now a day also), teachers used long, thin sticks to hit kids to punish (In Bangla "Bet"). You can say "Caning or Strokes". Parents know about it and they also think this is necessary for the kids. Now a day also many parents do this at home to manage their kids in Bangladesh.
NO, I never had this punishment. I wasn't that bad. After getting admitted to this school I found study is very hard and boring work. And I have so many interesting things to do on this earth. They always give me so much homework, that if I had tried I wouldn't be able to complete those. But for some other kids, it was easy. Soon teachers found that I don't study at all. But in the class, I was very gentle and a good girl. So, they have given me punishment to hold my ear and stand up on the bench. I should feel ashamed. I did kind of. But there were a bunch of other kids with me on the bench, so it wasn't that bad for me. You can assume that this punishment couldn't make me study. My teachers understood this is not working with me. So, they brought another way to make me study at home.
My older sister was in the same school. She was such a good girl, both in her behaviour and study. All people always asked me to follow her. I never listened. So, one day my teacher called her from her class. I was standing up on the bench. My teacher said to my sister, "Look at your sister, she is always like this, never memorize anything (That is the main study in Bangladesh, you have to memorize all the textbooks. To pass the exam some people memorize the math too), always keep standing up on the bench." I saw my sister's face, she didn't say anything but felt ashamed and became angry. Now I became afraid. If she told this to my mom, my mom may beat me up. Though, that was very common in my everyday life. But I didn't want it more.
At home my sister came to me and asked me to concentrate on study, otherwise, she will tell this to mom. I said I will study. I did some for a couple of days. Now a day think, actually she told my mom and my mom probably suggested my sister for telling me this way. I know my older sister, she never misses an opportunity to put me down.
At the end of the year, I scored 2nd best. Everybody was surprised, especially my teachers. And they stopped giving me punishment. I felt they started liking me. Not because of punishment, but I stopped study again because I couldn't make enough energy and time for it. Though in the class I was always given full attention to the teacher. I still have that quality. I am a very good listener.
When my son started school, he didn't want to do classwork or homework. Other Bangladeshi moms told me to beat him up. No, I didn't, I tried to make him do things with love and care. Still, I try that way. If failed I use my cards (Like no computer game, no TV, no mobile phone etc), and these works like magic.
Real-life is more interesting and adventurous than any novel. When you hear from people you will be amazed how two people have started feeling for each other. Sometimes even without meeting or seeing each other. You never know what is waiting for your life, so wait and enjoy.
I have got this feeling When I was listening to this song. And I am a big fan of Rahat Fateh Ali Khan (Singer).
[English version has given in bold]
koi bole dariya hai
kaisa, kaisa hai isq
koi maane sehra hai
kaisa, kaisa hai isq
koi sone sa tole re
koi maati sa bole re
koi bole ke chandi ka hai chhura
hota aise ye mauke pe
roka jaaye na roke se
achcha hota hai hota ye bura
kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai..
somebody says it's a sea,
how, how's love
somebody says it's a desert,
how, how's love
somebody weighs like gold,
somebody says it's like soil,
somebody says it's a silver knife.
it happens at such a time,
you can't stop even if you wish to,
it's good and it's bad.
how's this love, it's a strange risk.
muskilon mein ye daale
jo bhi chahe kara le,
badle ye dilon ke faisle,
man ka mauji,
isq to ji
albeli si raahon pe le chale
koi peechhe na aage hai
phir bhi jaane kyun bhaage hai
maare isqe ka isqe ka dil mera
isqe uske ye hisse mein
tere mere ye kisse mein
maula seekhe bin seekhe bin de sikha
kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai..
kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai..
it lands (you) into trouble,
it gets done whatever it wishes to,
it changes hearts' decisions,
doer of its own wishes,
this love is,
it takes you on unique roads,
nobody is there ahead or behind,
still don't know why it runs,
my heart is a victim of love,
in his and her parts,
in this story of yours and mine,
O God, teach me without me making an effort to learn.
how's this love, it's a strange risk.
ga ga ga ga ga ma ga
ga ga ga ga ga ma ga
ga ga ga ga ga ma ga re sa re dha ni
(Aalaap)
naina laage to jaage
bina dori ya dhaage
bandhte hain do naina khwaab se
na ata ho na pata ho
kore naino mein koi aa base,
iska uska na iska hai
jaane kitna hai kiska hai
kaisi bhaasa mein bhasa mein hai likha
isqe uske ye hisse mein
tere mere ye kisse mein
maula seekhe bin seekhe bin de sikha
kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai..
kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai..
When my eyes met (someone's eyes) I woke up,
without a cord or string,
two eyes are met by way of dreams,
there is no offer, nothing is known,
and in blank (new) eyes someone comes and stays,
love neither his nor her,
nobody knows how much is whose,
I don't know what language it is written..
in his and her parts,
in this story of mine and yours,
O God, teach me without me making an effort to learn..
how's this love, it's a strange risk..
I used to live alone. Maybe I was surrounded by many people, but I use to keep busy with my own thought and do my own things. When I talked, people uses to listen. It was never like a conversation.
In school, I have seen girls have so many things to share. They share their knowledge about everything, I wonder from where they had got that. They share their experience and whatever they have seen. I was new in this situation. I don't have anything to talk about. I mean I didn't feel that I can share anything that can be interesting to others. Now I know that wasn't true, but on those days I couldn't find anything to say or share. So, I became a very good listener. Sometimes I share a couple of things with my older sister, which I heard in school. My sister said, they lied, this can't be true. I surprise, Oh I didn't think about that!
Let me give you some examples. One girl said a dog spit and all humans have born from that. No girl denied that. I have asked my older sister later. She said, never believe these words.
In school, almost every girl said, in their village home, their grandparents have 3 ponds. One is for men to take a bath, another one is for women to take a bath. And the last one is for kids to take a bath. My grandparents (Paternal) are from Dhaka. I couldn't say any story from the village. But I told them maternal grandparents' house has a pond. They looked at me, that I came from such a poor family.
They all uses to say in Eid they have got 5/6 dresses from parents and more from their relatives so they almost got 12/15 dresses. Poor me, only get 1 dress from my parents. I felt so miserable. But didn't say anything to them. Later my son uses to get 15/20 dresses from all the family members. I never had to buy his outdoor dresses. I felt maybe Allah fulfilled my wish through my son. Though it stopped after moving to Canada.
One day girls were talking about going abroad. They said if you have a black dot (In Bangla "Teel") on your leg then you will go abroad. I said what will happen if I had already been abroad? I had come from Saudi Arabia. They replied, then it's over. You won't go again. I felt very sad. Though, later I had visited Malaysia, India, Nepal, Bhutan, UAE and now living in Canada.
I have seen moms love their children. In Bangladesh, moms will do everything for their boys. They will wake them up, prepare their dresses like cleaning, pressing etc, will make food for them if possible will feed them. They will try to know everything happening with them and will try to guide them to prevent them to mix with any wrong person, especially with girls. Their love has no boundary, no limit. But it is not without any selfishness. Moms don't want anybody who can take attention from their boys. She can tolerate their friends. But not his wife. Few moms don't want their boys to get married. Most of them agree to see them married because they need the next generation. But it doesn't mean the wife can take any money from their son. Mom wants everything. Boys heart, money and attention, everything. That's why moms raise their sons in a way that they will always depend on their mom. Moms Will keep doing emotional blackmails so that their attention won't go anywhere. The mom gives born so it's their property. These moms don't want or feel hesitant to take help from girls. No matter how rich their girls become, she likes to have everything from the boys. Girls are not her property, girls are for someone else.
Why is this situation? Mostly from tradition. Moms have seen their mom and mom-in-law, do the same. Why are they all doing so? In Bangladeshi culture, boys are responsible for their parents, moms. A girl gets born and raised in a family as some other family's property. After marriage, girls' parents have no right on their girls. The in-law family will take the girl's earnings and help. She can't help their own parents, that doesn't look good, or only when their in-laws give her permission to do so. She will be treated in the in-law as an outsider, so no love or care for her. But the girl's duty is to do everything and give all her earnings. Even her husband won't love and listen to her. He can't do or give anything to her if his mother doesn't like it. So, this girl has no one, neither parents nor in-laws to love. After giving birth she will get a son who can be her emotionally if she could make him be like that. Her girls will marry and go to another family. Now if somehow this boy doesn't look after her, not only by giving money but also by support emotionally, she has no one. In old age, she needs enough money to survive, and someone who will love her. So, how can she let her boys go? This way, this cycle is continuing.
I am a mother of a son too. I do everything for my son. It doesn't mean I don't want him to be independent. But my son is very lazy. He wants his mom or anyone who will do every work for him. Everyday mother-son argument happens, mostly because I ask him to do his own work. I want him to get marry soon and live his own life. I don't want to control him. I will help if they need any. Otherwise, I want them to live in their own way and stay happy always.
I was new in Bangladesh. I didn't know what Bangladeshi girls uses to play. I tried to play with them in school. Couldn't do well. For a change, I have created a new game. In Saudi Arabia, I knew we uses to sing this song in Madrasa and make a circle. Then we walk around by holding each other's hands and at the end of the song we sit. So, I have started this song as a poem and made this rule that when we sit, whoever sits at the end, that person will be out. So this way our ring will become smaller and at the end, we will find our winner. Soon this new game became very popular. I have seen girls from other classes are also playing it. I felt good, I have created this ;)
On those days I didn't know the lyrics, so whatever I remember I put them together. Today I found the real one ( I guess) and sharing it with you.
Ring-a-ring-a-roses
A pocket full of posies
A tissue, a tissue
We all fall down
The king has sent his daughter
To fetch a pail of water
A tissue, a tissue
We all fall down
The robin on the steeple
Is singing to the people
A tissue, a tissue
We all fall down
The wedding bells are ringing
The boys and girls are singing
A tissue, a tissue
We all fall down
In Bangladesh, people think going abroad means going to heaven. It's a dream of almost every person to go abroad. Most of them don't want to come back, some of them think they will come back after a vacation or study. We believe the first world, is the best in every way.
The truth is, the first world is very good in many ways. But not everything is better than 3rd world. They even don't know, in some cases, 3rd world or 2nd world is managing things much better way. There are still many rooms to improve in 1st world.
So, we should think, we are all in the same world. Anything that we do, may give an impact somewhere else in this world. We have to try to make it better. The world won't get better by itself. We have to try. Maybe a very small step will give a very big good result in future, or maybe it will go in vain. But it's worth giving a try to make things better. Or just stay not doing anything wrong.
Our school was very near to our home. If there were no high-rise building, we could have seen it from our window. But we could hear the bell. It only took a couple of minutes to go there.
In school, we had one break. It was 30 minutes break. Students were allowed to go out. This was the best time for street foods. Many food vans uses to come to the school door during this time. The price was low and food quantity was also very small. But the taste was great. You might be guessing I have enjoyed that food, right? NO.
My mom never gave me pocket money to buy anything in school. She even didn't give me a lunch box. She said, our house is very near to the school. So, you can come and eat from home, if you feel hungry. One day I have decided to go home. A couple of my friends also join me, they thought my mom must have made something special that's why I'm going home. My mom wasn't ready for this. She fried an egg and with some Porotas. I have eaten that and one or two friends join me. Others didn't like it. Who likes eggs? Later my mom said, you suppose to come alone.
Anyway, I never went home again during the lunch break. I just enjoyed my break by playing. And watching others eating delicious foods. Like pickles, ice cream, fruits prepared with salt and other masalas, chatpoti, fuchka etc.
One day I don't remember why I have got some money for lunch. The amount was very low, in the lunch break, I went outside and I found with that amount I can buy a "Kotbel" (Elephant apple or sourwood apple). The seller made a hole at the top and put some salt and dry chilli powder in it and then mixed it with a bamboo stick and give it to me. I was flying in heaven.
In our class, there was an unwritten rule. Whoever buys any Kotbel others uses to taste it from them. My amount was small so I bought a small one. Still, I was very happy to share it with others. I don't get much chance to do it. Some of them said, hey, let her eat it, it is small, if we take too much there won't be much for her.
The moment I have started taking steps to reduce my weight, trust me the whole world stand against me.
1. First people are buying ice-creams and put them in the freeze,
2. People are inviting to dinner(The time suppose to eat less) and make sure that I am eating enough.
3. I am having pain in my foot so can't run or walk like before. It is helping to increase my weight.
4. Feeling dizzy so have to sit down and take a rest.
5. New painkiller is making me fall asleep. You know, how daytime sleeps helps people to gain weight.
6. Didn't get any job yet so, not going outside daily. This helps to gain weight.
7. When people visiting our house, bringing rich food.
8. The painkiller is making me starving for food.
9. I had to stop walking on the treadmill because of foot pain.
Still, I am trying my best to control taking rich food and the amount of the food. I am doing exercise regularly. I have reduced my food. I hope someday, I will have a better body.
Saudi is like a country of desert. Though we lived in cities, the desert was around us. There was a very common insect living with us, the scorpion. In Saudi, they called it Agraap. It stings with poison. If it stings a kid, the kid might die. I heard from my mom, that many of the kids dies in Saudi from the stings of this scorpion.
My older sister said when Shekha (Our youngest sister) was born my mom uses to clean the bed frequently. And many times she found Agraap in bed. But by the grace of Allah, it never bites Shekha.
One night I was falling asleep. My mom was on her night duty. My dad was praying for Esha before he was planning to go to bed. Suddenly I heard my dad is calling me. I woke up and saw, he hit something with his sandal. He was in pain. He asked me to go to my mom and tell her that he had got bitten by an Agraap.
In a second I start running on the road, my mom's clinic was at the end of the block. It was night so no traffic was there. It was a very dark night. I knew I have to bring help as soon as possible before the poison capture my dad totally. I reached the clinic and found my mom was busy with some patients. She told me later that she saw me it looks like I don't have any blood on my face. My lips became very dry. I informed dad's condition in one line. Mom stayed calm, she let her patient finished. Then inform others. They get ready within a second. Because of deadly poison, every moment was important. They came to our house with all equipment. I saw my dad lying on the floor. But dad was awaking. He told them he had killed that Agraap but now can't tolerate the pain. Doctors give my dad injections. I think it was Teena's(My friend) dad.
My dad became normal soon.
There are many government offices, where we apply for service or permission or for any other reason. Then we wait. We keep waiting for days, months, and sometimes years. I can understand they might have too many applications and people need time to review them all. But I think when it is taking too long why don't you recruit more people. I am sure many people like me are looking for a good job.
When I saw this song, I saw an actress was crying and singing. I assumed it's a very heartbroken song. The melody of the song also feels like someone is very sad and singing this song in tears. Is it? When I concentrate on the lyrics I felt, it's actually a very happy song. Someone can't hold her tears because of happiness. The voice of Nilufar Yeasmin really matches the song.
এতো সুখ সইবো কেমন করে
How to sew so much happiness
বুঝি কান্নাই লেখা ছিল ভাগ্যে আমার
I understood that living in tears was my destiny
সুখেও কান্না পায় দুচোখ ভরে।।
so that I get tears in happiness too, with my eyes full
দুখের স্রোতে ভাসা ফুল
Flowers floating in the stream of sorrow
কোনদিন পায় না তো কূল।
It's doesn't get any day to end.
আমি বুঝিবা পথের ভুলে
Maybe I came here by mistake
এলাম নতুন কূলে।
to the new shore
এ পথ আবার দূরে যাবে কী সরে।।
Will this path will go away?
স্বপ্নের মত মনে হয়
Sounds like a dream
হারাবার তাই এতো ভয়।
That's why I'm so afraid of losing it.
তুবু যেটুকু পেলাম আমি
Yet as much as I got
প্রানের চেয়েও দামি।
More precious than life.
চোখের জলে সবই যাবে কী ঝরে।।
In grade two I had entered my second school in Bangladesh. On those days it was a tin-shaded one-floor school. We had a playground in front of it. Our school boundary was made of bamboo. Now it became a four or five-storied building with no playground. These days, many Bangladeshi, especially in Dhaka don't have any playgrounds in the schools. People are investing money on the structure, school materials and education quality, but a playground. In most cases, they don't have enough space for a playground. The city population is too dense to make some space for kids. Now, who will speak for the kids? In Bangladesh, nobody listens to them, especially the parents. These kids (Most of them) don't have time or place to play, they are only allowed to study, if anyone is lucky they can do other extra curriculum activities.
I have studied in this school from grade 2 to 4. I have many memories and I don't remember in which grade what happened.
As I mentioned earlier, after coming from Saudi Arabia this was our first school. I and my older sister started study over here. Though we were Bangladeshi, our culture was different than theirs. We in many ways we had faced cultural shock. In those days, the internet wasn't available, so people did not know about different cultures. People don't accept things that are not familiar to them easily.
My mom bought small briefcases to carry books to school. It looks cute. In Saudi Arabia, people can bring anything to carry books. My sister took that to school and the school complained and asked us to change it. So, we had started taking bags to school. Later I have seen in the class, some kids don't bring anything to carry books. They just hold everything tightly with their hands and bring it to school. I'm sure, now day this won't be allowed. But I felt they are kind of free. But now I know, actually, their parents wanted to save some money because of their financial situation.
We had a school dress. I have seen most of the students didn't follow them accurately. It's not just because of financial condition, but they just didn't like to follow. And school wasn't strict with it on those days. Now things have changed. For example, we had a specific belt to wear and students used to wear anything they want, very few of them use to wear specific shoes, some of them uses to come to school barefoot, some only maintain the main dress then added anything they like to wear. I didn't have that luxury, my parents make me wear a full dress according to the rule. Now I do that with my son.
I will write more about this school life in my future posts. Let's not make this post longer.
